有一天，舅舅突然联系我，说要给娃儿压岁钱。
我第一反应是：
“不用给。”
嘴巴比脑子快。
舅舅马上回了一句：
“你怎么能替阿学做决定呢？”
我愣了一下。
对哦。
于是我转头对娃儿说：
“你自己跟舅舅说。”
我以为他会学我那套客气话——
“谢谢，不用啦。”
没想到他愣了一秒，然后非常真诚地说：
“可是我想要。”
一个想给，一个想要。
我站在中间，突然觉得，好像也没什么好拦的。
于是我退后一步。
娃儿立刻问我：
“那现在要说什么？”
我说：
“你要说谢谢。”
娃儿马上现学现用：
“谢谢舅舅！”
“祝你新年快乐！”
那发音，说得还挺标准的。
后来他问我：
“一千块人民币是我们这里多少钱？”
我说：
“大概一百五十美金。”
他回了一句：
“要是我在中国就好了。”
我一脸疑惑：
“为什么？”
他说：
“一千块在中国能买更多东西。”
这脑子转得，比汇率还快。
我忍不住说：
“其他孩子一般也就五六十块，你都上千了。再不满足就叫 greedy 了。”
他笑了笑。
显然已经被我看穿了那点小心思。
但其实，这一幕让我在意的不是钱。
而是三件事：
第一，我差点替他做决定。
第二，他敢说：“我想要。”
第三，他拿到钱之后，会说谢谢。
这比金额重要。
很多孩子被教成只会客气，不会表达真实欲望。
很多大人习惯替孩子决定“该不该要”。
但昨晚，我退了一步。
让他自己选择。
钱不重要。
表达重要。
边界重要。
感恩也重要。
还有一个小细节。
晚上，他一个人在那里小声练习：
“谢谢，祝你新年快乐。”
来来回回说了好几次。
听着听着，我突然觉得——
孩子其实也在认真学习，
怎么好好地接受一份爱。
婷妈的亲子日常 创作于 2026.03.07
原创发布： tingtingma.com
写给孩子，也写给正在成长的大人。
未经授权，请勿转载。
Tingma’s Parenting Journal | 208. Lucky Money — “But I Want It”
One day, my brother suddenly contacted me and said he wanted to give my son some lucky money for the New Year.
My first reaction was:
“No need to give him any.”
My mouth moved faster than my brain.
My brother immediately replied,
“How can you make that decision for Asher?”
I paused.
He was right.
So I turned to my son and said,
“You tell Uncle yourself.”
I thought he would copy the polite response adults often use:
“Thank you, but that’s okay.”
Instead, he paused for a second and said very sincerely:
“But I want it.”
One person wanted to give.
One person wanted to receive.
Standing in the middle, I suddenly felt there was really no reason to stop it.
So I stepped back.
My son immediately asked me,
“So what should I say now?”
I said,
“You should say thank you.”
He quickly put it into practice:
“Thank you, Uncle!”
“Happy New Year!”
His pronunciation was surprisingly good.
Later he asked me,
“How much is one thousand RMB here?”
I said,
“About one hundred and fifty U.S. dollars.”
He replied,
“I wish I were in China.”
I looked at him, confused.
“Why?”
He said,
“Because one thousand RMB can buy more things in China.”
His brain moved faster than the exchange rate.
I couldn’t help teasing him:
“Most kids only get fifty or sixty. You already got over a thousand. If you’re still not satisfied, that would be called greedy.”
He smiled.
Clearly, he knew I had seen right through his little thoughts.
But honestly, what stayed with me from that moment wasn’t the money.
It was three things.
First, I almost made the decision for him.
Second, he had the courage to say,
“I want it.”
Third, after receiving it, he knew to say thank you.
Those things matter more than the amount.
Many children are taught to be polite, but not to express their real desires.
Many adults are used to deciding for children whether they should accept something or not.
But that night, I stepped back.
And let him choose.
Money isn’t the important part.
Expression matters.
Boundaries matter.
Gratitude matters.
There was also a small moment later that night.
He sat there quietly, practicing to himself:
“Thank you. Happy New Year.”
He repeated it several times.
Listening to him, I suddenly realized—
Children are also learning, in their own way,
how to properly receive love.
Tingma’s Parenting Journal
Written on March 7, 2026
Originally published at: tingtingma.com
Written for my child, and for the adults who are still growing.
Unauthorized reproduction is not permitted.
Originally written in Chinese by the author.
This English version was translated with the assistance of ChatGPT.