下午，
娃儿兴奋地跑进来，抱着两大箱玩具，很开心，又有点担心地跟我分享他的喜悦。
我知道他是怕我会说他乱花钱。
我笑笑地看着他：
“真好！”
心想着，这两样肯定不便宜。
我尽量保持住笑脸，免得让他看出我不高兴。
细问一下，才知道乐高一样就得99块。
原来他非要买两样，娃爹就这样又被哄着花钱了。
另一样之前查过，要50块。我觉得不值这个钱，圣诞节那会儿就没买。
于是，我对娃儿说：
“要不，我们留一样好不好？”
娃儿觉得我在批评他了，前一秒还在开心地跟我分享玩具里的东西，后一秒就说：
“你别碰这个，别碰我的被子，别碰电脑！”
然后抱着两样玩具离开了我的视线。
我心想，继续下去肯定适得其反，得想个办法跟他好好说说。
“学，你过来一下，我们好好聊一聊。”
我语气非常温和地叫他。
他估计知道我在打他的乐高的主意，不理我。
我说：
“要不然这样，你先别打开。”
“先冷静冷静，有时候是消费冲动，可能也没那么喜欢。”
“你看看地上这一堆，买回来就摆了一下，到处乱丢了。”
“我天天玩！”
娃儿为自己辩解。
“你哪里天天玩了？”
我顺着他的话说。
“要不然这样，你把乐高藏到一个我看不到的地方，反正你先别打开就行！”
娃儿看到我没有在打他乐高的主意，才对我有些松懈。
我心想，这实在太惯着孩子了。
不能让孩子养成不劳而获的习惯。
99块的乐高，不是九块九。
过了会儿，我突然冒出个念头，于是又把他叫了进来。
我说：
“要不这样吧，下次我多给你十块，从三十块零花钱变成四十块，你把那个乐高给退了。爸爸赚钱也很辛苦，我们不能这样花钱，太贪婪了。”
娃儿还是扭头就走了。
原来我开出的条件不吸引人。
顿时想起前两天给他存了五十块，我说：
“回来，这样吧，我另外给你五十块，三十块加五十块，下次零花钱一共给你八十块，你只要把那个给退了。”
娃儿愣了两秒，估计头脑里在算数学题了，说：
“这个不正常！”
我知道他已经觉得自己很赚了。
一个是不用他自己花钱买的玩具，一个是手上的八十块钱。
“你要给我五万块才行！”
他笑嘻嘻地说。
“五万那么多！”
我也笑嘻嘻地回。
“这个给你玩！”
娃儿说。
刚刚明明还不让我碰的。
听得出来，娃儿心里已经答应了。
“那就这么说定了。”
于是，他跟我很开心地击了个掌。
我心想，总算把这个难题搞定了。
婷妈的亲子日常 创作于 2026.06.01
原创发布： tingtingma.com
写给孩子，也写给正在成长的大人。
未经授权，请勿转载。
Tingma’s Parenting Diary | No. 273: Turns Out Raising a Child Requires Negotiation Skills
One afternoon,
my son came running in, carrying two large boxes of toys.
He looked excited, but also a little nervous as he shared his excitement with me.
I knew why.
He was worried that I might tell him he had wasted money.
So I smiled and said:
“That’s great!”
Meanwhile, I was thinking:
Those two things can’t be cheap.
I tried my best to keep smiling so he wouldn’t notice that I wasn’t entirely happy about it.
After asking a few questions, I learned that one of the LEGO sets alone cost $99.
Apparently, he insisted on getting both items, and his dad had once again been persuaded into buying them.
The other toy was something I had looked up before.
It was around $50.
I didn’t think it was worth the price, so I hadn’t bought it during Christmas.
So I said:
“How about we keep one and return the other?”
My son immediately felt criticized.
One second earlier he had been happily showing me all the cool features of the toys.
The next second he said:
“Don’t touch this. Don’t touch my blanket. Don’t touch my computer!”
Then he grabbed both toys and disappeared from my sight.
I thought to myself:
This is not going in the right direction.
I’d better find another way to talk to him.
“Xue, come here. Let’s talk.”
I called him over in the gentlest voice I could manage.
He probably knew I was after his LEGO set.
He ignored me.
So I tried again.
“How about this? Don’t open it yet.”
“Give yourself some time to cool off. Sometimes we buy things on impulse and don’t actually like them as much as we think.”
I pointed at the pile of toys on the floor.
“Look at all these. You played with them once and then left them lying around.”
“I play with them every day!”
he protested.
“Do you really?”
I replied.
Then I said:
“How about hiding the LEGO somewhere I can’t see it? Just don’t open it for now.”
The moment he realized I wasn’t trying to take the LEGO away from him immediately, he relaxed a little.
I thought to myself:
This is way too indulgent.
I can’t let him develop a habit of getting things without earning them.
A $99 LEGO set isn’t the same as a $9.99 toy.
A little while later, an idea suddenly popped into my head.
So I called him back.
“How about this?”
“Next time, I’ll give you an extra ten dollars. Your allowance will go from thirty dollars to forty dollars if you return that LEGO set.”
“Dad works very hard for his money. We shouldn’t spend money this way. It’s too greedy.”
My son turned around and walked away again.
Apparently, my offer wasn’t attractive enough.
Then I remembered that I had put fifty dollars into his savings just a couple of days earlier.
So I called him back once more.
“Wait. How about this?”
“I’ll give you another fifty dollars. Thirty plus fifty. Next time you’ll have eighty dollars in allowance if you return that LEGO set.”
He froze for two seconds.
I could practically see him doing math in his head.
Then he said:
“That’s not normal.”
I immediately knew he thought he was getting a great deal.
On one side was a toy he didn’t have to pay for himself.
On the other side was eighty dollars in cash.
“You’re going to have to give me fifty thousand dollars.”
he said with a grin.
“Fifty thousand? That’s a lot of money!”
I replied, also grinning.
Then he suddenly handed me the toy.
“You can play with this.”
Just moments ago, he wouldn’t even let me touch it.
I could tell he had already agreed in his heart.
“Then it’s a deal.”
I said.
And we happily sealed it with a high five.
As I watched him walk away, I thought to myself:
Well, that problem is finally solved.
Tingma’s Parenting Diary
Written on June 01, 2026
Originally published at: tingtingma.com
Written for my child, and for the adults who are still growing.
Unauthorized reproduction is prohibited.
Originally written in Chinese by the author.
This English version was translated with the assistance of ChatGPT.